I’ve decided to write, since I have been trying to open the
internet on this ancient computer and it says hardware disabled and no link,
whatever the hell that means. I haven’t written for a while and honestly id
rather type than just hand write in a journal because I start getting angry
because of how atrocious my handwriting is. Yes I said because twice in one sentence. I have been on a kick lately,
watching television series. Don’t get me wrong I LOVE reading a good book, or
series, but television—picture just brings everything more to life. Yes, if I
had lived a different life I would have wanted to be an actress, not for the
fame, but for the chance to pretend to be someone else, many someone elses, it
just seems fun. I am not going to lie; I have fallen into the “teen paranormal
romance” phenomenon of America.
I know it’s very pathetic. I just finished watching the entire Rowell TV series.
It was pretty ridiculous, but I cried when it ended. Cue laughing. Now I am
watching Felicity, which has no science fiction involved (sigh of relief). The
narration writing is amazing. It has provoked me to write about college, since
it follows a girl’s journey through college. The word “college” it gives me
butterflies because college was the best 4 years of my life.
Lets start
by saying I hated high school, and haven’t stepped foot there since May of 2006
the night I graduated. Cliché –ly I never fit in anywhere really. So going to
college, starting new, being whoever I wanted, was sort of like getting to be
an actress and starting a new series, one where I wasn’t the outsider that
never connected, really connected with anyone. College was MY time, and
connecting was all I did. Friendships were born, relationships were born, and
memories were unavoidably created and will forever be kept in a special
compartment of my mind. I revisit that compartment often, like a library, I
sometimes grab a book from the college library of my mind and read and
remember. Have I lost you? I ramble sometimes, and I apologize.
Derek, now
my husband, …I can’t think of college and not think of him. I liked him from
the beginning, when I saw him, not really spoke. He was just different, I could
tell. He had thoughts, actual thoughts, not blank stares or pointless actions.
Who am I kidding, he’s human, and we all have pointless actions…a lot of them. But
this was my admiration and clear interest from afar. It was just different, and
now, now that we are married J I realize he was different because he is my soul
mate. We make many connections, I keep using that word, in our lives, some are
strong and some not as strong, but then some are just deeper connections. This
is when you see that person, really see them. And I saw Derek, I got him.
I was going
to end this entry there, with that epic sentence, but it just didn’t feel done
yet. Its hard to pinpoint my favorite memory from college, there are hundreds.
Wow, this is really hard, and I may need to think on it a while.
Southerners,
most obvious. If you don’t know what that is, you’re really missing out. Staying
up, all night, just hanging out and having conversation with newly made friends
on the front steps of Dixon, my dorm. Driving to McDonald’s to get a
cheeseburger and realizing it is so late, or so early rather, that you reach in
your bag and pull out a biscuit instead. Camp
Pink and its many parties. Dancing,
lots and lots of dancing. Turning 21, and finally being able to go into
Pelham’s Bar and then realizing how epically lame it is, ha! Yet, we still go
there.
8:00 AM Mr. Baker’s drawing class with Kat,
three hours with just a drawing pad and pencils. Loving my art history classes,
when everybody else hated them. Changing my major to art, ultimately following
my heart. Meeting and falling in love with my husband, which is a given. Moving
in with Emily, Jennifer, and Steven, they were my family for a year and have my
eternal respect and love.
Like I said
the word college gives me butterflies. It was the best 4 years of my life.
To be continued, eventually…
